Premier Performance
Titanic Tian
The commentators at Chelsea premier Arena would run out of superlatives to describe Grilled skipper
Tian Yonghang, who was at one point described - not without merit - as a god among men for the unrivalled command he exerted over what was only technically a contest. His five goals were only the tip of a flawless all-round display, the likes of which have seldom been seen in this corner of the world.
While his feats being achieved against part-timers would detract from their immensity, this Chelsea premier side were one of the stronger semi-pro sides around, having won their Division Five league last season with only a single defeat. Their captain Lim Wai Wan, a well-known secondary school football coach, promised total commitment from his team; which they did give, only to run up against a guy from another level.
Perhaps fortune was against the plucky hosts from the start, with expat bank executive Jonathan Tarlow attempting to give
Leong Wan Kang an old-fashioned warning tap on the ankles on their first encounter. He didn't count on Leong dropping like a sack of potatoes without warning, and to his horror, referee Paul Kjellmo saw the contact.
Wong Ping Shun might not have had the rub of the green with penalties lately, but he got back on track with a calm conversion.
With the underdogs' usual hope of a frustrating deadlock gone, Chelsea were at a loss as to how to proceed. The Birds would make their decision for them, by continuing to pound on the door with attacks from all directions.
Remco van der Ban would be booked for roughhousing on Lim, before
Low Aik Jia extended Grilled's lead, streaking by a neutralised Tarlow. The slippery winger made it three in the 21st, as the Chelsea defence simply could not come to grips with the speed of his interchanges with
Rinor Isufi.
On another day, Low might have been in contention for Man of the Match, but Tian had not even come into his own. The Grilled skipper had not misplaced a pass throughout, but had not done anything of special notice... and then he first-timed it into the roof of the net, from near thirty yards out. And, as if to prove that it was no fluke, he dribbled by three men on the restart, before doing a repeat.
That might have been enough for some forwards, but Tian was just warming up. There was a lull for the remainder of the half, but another bold solo masterstroke in the 57th minute signalled the resumption of festivities. It wasn't that Chelsea had given up - Megat Amir Faisal bin Mat Ail tried manfully to run Tian down - but simply that Tian was too good.
His hat-trick secured, Tian was nevertheless far from done. His movement at this stage had to be seen to be believed, and he seemed to almost be scoring at will. Another nonchalent lob from distance followed, and he had five by the 70th minute, chipping Peng Yingren with otherworldly flair. Tarlow's sad attempt at winning a penalty only served to highlight Tian's skill all the more.
There was some ironic cheering when Tian finally revealed that he was still mortal, when his behind-the-back attempt was clawed over the bar by Peng, who was promptly mobbed by his teammates.
Zhao Jing Wei nodded in after the ensuing corner was briefly cleared, but this did not dampen the home support's excitement at having finally stopped Tian.
Low then spoilt what would have been a blameless outing by letting his wild side surface, as he cut taxi driver Lam Tong Long down after the latter had for once gotten the ball off him. Reserve coach Luis Alcántara could be seen shaking his head and turning away at the needless booking, which might be a sign that the winger will be seeing more time on the bench, until he sets his affairs in order.