The fans at the stadium today were roasting in the hot sun. The weather was sunny, which meant perfect conditions for technical players in both teams. However, it was also quite warm, which meant quick or physically strong players were drained faster and couldn't play their best game. The following players took the field: Germanakos - Keng Chuan, 其材 (Qicai) - Reddy, Thach, Kwang Tse, Khairul, Trindade - Chitre, Teck Fu, An Keng.

Starters: Ribeiro - Bergami, Mizdrak, Salazar - Schermann, Ibrahimović, Ronaldo, Guffanti, Aitiņš - Rabrenović, Gandia.

Grilled Birds trundled out to the pitch in a 2-5-3 formation. The visitors, A.C. Milan Scorpions, chose to start the game with a 3-5-2 lineup. Grilled used their divine (+9) (29) ability to concentrate their attacks in the middle of the field. Lim An Keng is making an astonishing dash. The fans are chanting his name. You can hear it reverberate around the stadium. Now a manic sprint up the middle and into the box. Oh! He's thrown open the door! He's thrown open the door, shot the ball through, and slammed the door shut on Mr. Tumnus! Grilled has taken the lead 2 minutes into the match, 1 to 0. There'll be no Turkish Delight after the match for the keeper! The suddenness of Pēteris Aitiņš of Scorpions's pass to Oliver 'Il Biondo' Gandia caught the opposition looking the wrong way, and they could only watch as the ball sailed home for 1 - 1. Maybe Chad Thach should join the aquatics team instead. He went down dramatically after 21 minutes, crying out with agony as he fell. The referee was not impressed, though, and showed him a yellow for diving. 1 - 2 was the score after 29 minutes, when Scorpions's Zlatan Ibrahimović cut through the central defense and pounded one in. A thrilling play through the middle after 32 minutes gave Scorpions's Dragiša Rabrenović a chance to increase the lead, and he happily obliged. The score was then 1 - 3. After 33 minutes, a mistake by the home side's left defense allowed Simone Guffanti to get through. He outclassed the home side's keeper, adding another goal for the visitors. 1 - 4. Brian 'Was Born' Reddy challenged the visitors' central defense eagerly, producing a good chance 36 minutes into the game as he raced for a through ball. But, like so many times before, the guests' defensive positioning was just too good. The teams went for the halftime break at 1 - 4. Now to our celebrity commentator for a hot take. Over to you, Snoop! After 53 minutes, there was a bit of a mixup on the field as Scorpions found themselves out of position and their organization level dropped to solid (7). 62 minutes into the match, Grilled's Paulino Trindade chased down a ball sent down the right and put it into the back of the net, narrowing the score to 2 - 4. Grilled were determined to attack in the middle, even their wing attacks ended up coming through the center. The home club's fans got back into the match when Lim An Keng broke through the visitors' central defense and caught their keeper napping, making it 3 - 4. 76 minutes into the match, the visitors put themselves ahead 3 - 5 as Dragiša Rabrenović finished off an attack from the left with a spectacular bicycle kick. With the clock showing 85 minutes, the fourth official held up the substitution board. Hwang Teck Fu looked to see that it was his number in red, so he made his way over to the sideline and swapped out for Chan Ze Han, though he would have liked to continue. After 89 minutes, the Grilled coach wanted to see a new face on the field, waving Aw Keng Chuan off. Radovan Jaška took his place. With Aw Keng Chuan no longer on the field, Chan Ze Han was the new set pieces taker. It was announced by the fourth official that he estimated stoppage time to be around 2 minutes. This meant there could still be an extra attack or two left in the match! The match ends 3 - 5. Grilled did a good job holding on to the ball, with 53 percent of possession. We'll be back after these interminable commercial messages.

Grilled's best player was Gandhik Chitre. You can tell it was nickel beer night yesterday at the local bar because Radovan Jaška seemed to stumble all over the pitch. Scorpions's top performer was clearly Oliver 'Il Biondo' Gandia. Even six year old fans were wincing at the poor play by Jasmin Mizdrak today.